It’s Over

Well, it’s done.  It’s over.  The judge signed the papers this morning.  Only took twenty minutes.  No crying. No arguing.  Just the facts and the signature of approval.

Of course, it’s not “official” yet until we get the dissolution letter in the mail.  However, to me, the minute the judge signed off and dismissed us, it was final.  What starts out as so promising and hopeful is killed by a formal pen stroke.

We parted at the elevators.  The awkward hug between two exes.  He said, “Thanks for going on this journey with me.”  All I could do is say, “Yep, it’s been interesting.”  He mentioned still being friends and to feel free to reach out for help regarding our daughter at any time.  I nod and smile while I think, “You weren’t there before when you were legally bound to and now we’re not and you’re suddenly going to be there?  Yeah, right.”

I walked away from the courthouse a little numb and dazed, but amazingly at peace.  I’m actually going out the next few nights to celebrate with friends.  The sadness and mourning will surely hit at some point, but for now I’m going to enjoy my new-found freedom and take time to discover myself.  By doing this, perhaps someday I’ll find someone who is truly a good fit for me and not ending up in another lousy, dysfunctional relationship.  Cheers!