Design a Dude

9 Sep

Me and my friend, Kari, were discussing this over coffee a couple of weeks ago.  Wouldn’t it be awesome to be able to order a date like a sandwich? If we could build the perfect sandwich/date, what ingredients/traits would we choose?

According to Kari, this would be her deluxe sandwich/dude:

  • He has to sing to me like Jon Bon Jovi. There is nothing more romantic than a serenade by the fireplace before bed with a glass of wine. He gives love a good name!
  • He needs to have the strength and endurance of Lance Armstrong so we can run, hike or bike for hours on end without getting tired. Since I am very health-conscious, he’ll have to leave the juice at home.
  • He can’t be a marathoner in bed, however. Please be longer than my last partner, which was 30 seconds, literally. Even worse, the guy was in his early 30’s. What is up with that? Nothing I guess.
  • I like to laugh A LOT, so he has to be able to channel the late Robin Williams in the funny department.
  • He has to have empathy and understanding with every conversation we have. I want him to hang on my every word, as if it’s the most important thing in the world for him to hear.
  • I’m an introvert, so give me my space. Be competent and independent without me, but be available when I need you. I want to know you care, but thirty texts a day is a little excessive.
  • Chef please! I love a hot man who can cook good food. If I make a meal and it sucks, just say you love it and run to Taco Bell later.
  • A head of hair like Jon Bon Jovi and the body of Lance Armstrong would be perfect.
  • I want him to be smart, without being condescending or arrogant. 

Is this a tall list? Perhaps, but it’s better to have standards and be a little picky than settling for just a dude with a pulse and a credit card.

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